A Different Kind of Boredom
Every parent and every teacher has heard a child complain, “I’m bored” or “This is so boooring.”
It was true one hundred years ago and it is true today. How could it possibly be true today? After all, in the past one hundred years we have dramatically increased the entertainment possibilities. We carry screens with us that have access to a supply of music, movies, books, games that would have blown the minds of the kids bored in 1926.
How is it that kids are still bored?
It helps to consider that not all kinds of boredom are the same.
We are familiar with being bored in the moment. Nothing in front of you is interesting or engaging. This is called situational boredom. Maybe you are stuck in a waiting room, an airplane, or dare I say, a classroom. In situational boredom, you crave distraction.
Our phones and tablets are quick and easy solutions. They are full of new stimuli to alleviate our boredom. We can play a quick game, catch up on the news, chat with friends. We never have to be bored again.
And yet, we are still bored. There is a different kind of boredom we must consider. The truth is, you can be bored even with access to an Internet’s worth of media. You are bored because none of the distractions are satisfying. The distractions themselves are boring. This is referred to as existential boredom.
Kids experiencing existential boredom aren’t looking for a distraction. They are looking for meaning.
Both situational and existential boredom can lead us to similar solutions. Fostering curiosity, creativity, mindfulness, attentiveness, finding connections are all effective mindsets to reduce the experience of boredom. A major challenge for us is that the go-to solution to situational boredom, namely, ready access to devices, is not very good at fostering the type of mindsets we, or our children, need.
We need to do a better job of listening to our boredom. Our situational boredom might not be asking us for distraction and entertainment. Perhaps situational boredom is masking a deeper message that we never hear because we are quick to turn on the distractions. Ironically, the solution we (and our children) reach for to cure situational boredom ends up exacerbating existential boredom.
To be fair, short-term distractions existed one hundred years ago. The problem isn’t solely with social media, gaming, and digital devices, but they do help us see the problem more clearly. They can serve as a scapegoat for our problem and lead us to solutions that develop qualities in our children that will serve them well.
Most parents would be in favor of their children being more creative and curious. We get there by cultivating mindfulness and staying present, not seeking distractions. We can see the waiting room as a place we can observe life playfully, notice tiny delights on our commute, and see the world in front of our eyes, instead of our screens, as worthy of our attention. And our children will follow suit.
