When my mother-in-law turned 77, she decided it was finally time for a face and neck lift.
She wasn’t getting married. She wasn’t about to become the mother of the bride. She wasn’t attending a reunion or worried about ageism in the workplace. She hadn’t recently lost 50 pounds.
She had simply reached a point where, when she looked in the mirror, and no longer liked what she saw.
And perhaps, after more than ten years of knowing her son-in-law, she had finally decided she trusted him enough to let him perform the surgery.
That experience has stayed with me because it highlights one of the most common questions I hear as a plastic surgeon: When is the right time to “do something?”
There is no universal answer.
We spend much of our lives pursuing inner happiness and self-acceptance, yet we also live in a world where appearances matter. Humans are visual creatures. The time between worrying about acne as a teenager and wrinkles as an adult is surprisingly short.
Preventive medicine has gradually expanded into aesthetic medicine. There are now more medspas than McDonalds, making Botox at least as available as a Big Mac. Additionally, social media has introduced many people to cosmetic procedures years earlier than previous generations. It isn’t unusual for me to meet patients in their thirties asking whether they should consider a facelift soon.
The answer rarely begins with age.
Instead, it begins with a conversation.
One of the first questions I ask during a consultation is revealing:
“If you had a magic wand, what would you change?”
The answer opens up a conversation not only about what bothers the person, but also whether the timing is right—and whether surgery is even the best solution.
Some people are excellent candidates for non-surgical treatments. Others benefit from addressing concerns earlier with surgery, when tissues are firmer and results may last longer. Some patients choose surgery first and maintain their results with minimally invasive treatments. Others prefer to begin with nonsurgical options and postpone surgery until later in life.
There is no single path because there is no single way we age.
In fact, aging tends to happen more like riding an elevator than an escalator. We often remain relatively unchanged for years before suddenly noticing new jowls, heavier eyelids, deeper folds, or changes in our neck and jawline.
We also age in different ways. Gravity gradually pulls tissues downward. Facial volume diminishes. Repeated muscle movement creates expression lines. Skin changes in texture, elasticity, and pigmentation. Two people of the same chronological age may look remarkably different, influenced by genetics, sun exposure, smoking, stress, weight changes, and overall health.
Recent weight-loss medications such as GLP-1 therapies have added another consideration. While they have transformed many lives, significant weight loss can also accelerate facial volume loss and skin laxity, leading some patients to consider rejuvenation earlier than they otherwise might have.
Fortunately, there are meaningful things we can do throughout life.
Healthy skin care begins early. Washing your face, wearing sunscreen every day, avoiding smoking, maintaining a healthy weight, and protecting your skin from excessive sun exposure all pay dividends over decades.
As we get older, treatment options naturally expand. Rhinoplasty is commonplace during late teenage years. Some people seek eyelid surgery, breast procedures, or body contouring after major life events such as pregnancy or weight loss. Mommy makeovers or Daddy do-overs follow. Others are interested in subtle facial rejuvenation, skin resurfacing, or injectables. Still others decide that they are perfectly content doing nothing at all.
All of these choices are valid.
My mother-in-law was delighted with her results. Would operating ten years earlier have produced even longer-lasting improvement? Probably. But the right time wasn’t ten years earlier.
The right time was when she was ready.
One of the greatest privileges of being a plastic surgeon is witnessing the relationship between inner confidence and outward appearance. My goal has never been to convince someone to have surgery. Rather, it is to create a comfortable conversation where patients can honestly express what they see, what they feel, and what they hope to achieve.
Sometimes that conversation leads to surgery. Sometimes it leads to a non-surgical treatment—or to no treatment at all.
Helping people find the approach that feels right for them is one of the most rewarding parts of my profession.
Korman Plastic Surgery & WunderBar MedSpa, with offices in Los Altos, Mountain View, San Jose, and Carmel-By-The-Sea, is the exclusive provider of plastic surgery articles in Los Altos Hills. Learn more at kormanmd.com.
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