Finding the Right Coach: An Equestrian Legacy

Children’s educators serve as an extension of family leadership. Parents are a child’s primary guardians and leaders first and foremost, and instructors, trainers, teachers, and coaches must function as direct extensions of the parents in order to achieve the best results.

As I mentioned in an earlier article, parents cannot communicate directly with the child during riding sessions. However, meaningful dialogue with the parent or guardian should preface and debrief each riding session. This ensures that the learning from the lesson continues well beyond the time the student is physically with the coach, carrying through the days between sessions.

This continuity is extremely significant to a student’s progress. Parents — especially in the horse world — should always seek out trainers who take the time to brief them on their child’s successes, challenges, and overall development. Equally important are the tools and reflections that are sent home with the child.

One of the most valuable of these tools is the riding journal. Journaling reinforces the lesson by requiring the child to recall what they worked on during their riding session. This process strengthens both memory and understanding. Beyond that, there are physical and neurological skills that must be practiced away from the horse. The rider has to prepare their body to move retroactively in coordination with the motion of the horse — this is not like riding a bike. A horse produces its own movement, and the rider must learn to respond instinctively to that movement rather than initiate it. For this reason, it is essential to take these concepts home and work on them throughout the week, when the child is not around a horse.

One principle I consistently emphasize in my coaching is that there should be no additional input directed at the student or the horse during a lesson except from the coach or trainer. This is critically important. The horse is a herd animal, and it will perceive input from a parent — who has a far deeper emotional bond with the child than the trainer ever could — as coming from a different authority figure. The horse may then begin to recognize a different “alpha” in the environment, which disrupts clarity, reduces efficiency, and limits the coach’s ability to guide progress at the highest level.

Once the horse’s connection with the trainer becomes cloudy, the information being exchanged between the student and the coach also becomes more confusing. This confusion compromises the learning process for both horse and rider.

Additionally, outside input is rarely delivered with the level of technical expertise required to produce a positive result. In my own coaching, I intentionally choose precise moments — sometimes over the course of several sessions — to correct specific mistakes a rider is making. At times, I allow the mistake to continue just long enough for a mild habit to form. This creates a more powerful learning moment, because the rider begins to recognize, both consciously and subconsciously, that something is not working. When the rider is actively seeking a solution, the correction becomes far more impactful and lasting.

That moment — when the student is ready to receive the answer — is the most effective time to introduce a refined technique.

So, as you search for a riding instructor for your child, make sure the instructor or coach is intentionally building a relationship with both you and your child. This is one of the clearest indicators of a coach’s true investment in your child’s progress.

Always remember:

Great instructors may be low in affluence, but their wealth is revealed in those to whom they are stewards — lives that carry influence forward for generations.