Balancing Tech in a Child’s Modern World

Technology is a part of our children’s world. There is no getting around that, and honestly, there shouldn’t be. Our children will grow up in an increasingly digital world, and it is our responsibility as educators and parents to help them navigate it thoughtfully and responsibly. 

But preparing children for a high-tech future does not mean giving them more technology. I believe it means making sure they have plenty of experiences that technology cannot provide. 

As Head of School at Palisades Episcopal School, I think often about the balance between high-tech and high-touch. Children need opportunities to build, create, explore, wonder, move, talk, imagine, make mistakes, solve problems, and simply be bored. These experiences are not extras. They are how children learn to think, persevere, communicate, and understand the world around them. 

When I walk into a classroom where children are building with blocks, working with clay, drawing, conducting an experiment, or creating something with their hands, I can see learning happening in a very different way. They are not simply receiving information. They are figuring things out and challenging their minds, bodies, and spirits. 

Productive struggle is powerful. When a child builds a tower and it falls, works through a difficult puzzle, or creates something that doesn’t go as planned, they have to slow down. They have to try again. They have to work with others. They have to think. 

And sometimes, they simply have to be bored. 

Boredom is not the enemy. It gives children space to imagine. It is often when children invent games, create stories, or discover an interest we never knew they had. 

Finding balance does not require throwing away devices or creating a screen-free childhood. It requires being intentional about what we give our children and what we might take away when a screen fills every quiet moment. While there is no perfect formula, we can take practical steps to ensure technology remains a tool rather than the center of childhood. 

1. Prioritize experiences that use their hands. Cook together. Garden. Build something. Draw. Play a board game. One of my personal favorites is putting together a puzzle. These simple activities create opportunities for problem-solving, conversation, creativity, and perseverance. 
2. Create spaces and times without technology. The dinner table is an obvious one. Perhaps it is also before or after school, or two hours before bed. Children need time to look up, make eye contact, talk, listen, and be fully present with the people around them. 
3. Let them work through the hard stuff. Resist the urge to make everything easier or faster. Whether it is a puzzle, a LEGO creation, a disagreement with a friend, or a project that isn’t going as planned, let children wrestle with it. There is tremendous learning in the process.

The goal is not to raise children who reject technology. It is to raise children who know how to use it without being controlled by it. 

Our children will need technological fluency. They will also need curiosity, empathy, resilience, creativity, patience, and the ability to think deeply. No device can teach all of those things for us. 

At PES, we talk often about educating the whole child: mind, body, and spirit. That means preparing children for the future while making sure they have the experiences that make childhood meaningful and memorable. 

So let them get messy. Let them build something that falls apart. Let them spend an afternoon outside. Let them be bored. 

And we need to put down the phone and join them. 

Those are the moments they and we are most likely to remember.