There’s a challenge that many women face (myself included) – that of living contentedly with the bodies we have. There are plenty of reasons for this: movies, media, the ideal numbers (remember 34-24-34?). We were “supposed” to look a certain way, and the honest truth is that most of us don’t. “Legs too short,” “ankles too fat, too skinny,” “too big,” “too flat,” too “something” not good. Take your pick. And somehow, no matter how much we know that this is an unkind and unrealistic way to experience ourselves, we can’t seem to shake it.
So, what do we do? For starters, let’s try this. Stand back from your mirror. Now look at yourself and notice how your eyes go directly to the part of your body you like the least. Is it your belly? Your thighs? Amazing, right? And automatic! Now do it again – but this time, squint. Same old judgments, or something a bit different? Notice, if you can, that when you squint, you tend to see your whole self, and not just that hated part. Well, guess what? That’s very likely the way others see you… that is, your whole self!
Now, why am I writing about this? It’s not just about our relationship with our bodies; it goes deeper than that. Perhaps we’re not very kind in our judgments of ourselves as humans, using standards like the “perfect” body measurements, rather than Popeye’s version (remember him, my friends, from the comic books and cartoons of the fifties?). Popeye said it far better than anyone else: “I am what I am and that’s what I am. I’m Popeye the Sailor Man.” Don’t you just love that? How liberating! The “flaws,” if we insist on labeling them as such, are simply part of the whole and very subjectively labeled as such.
Do we dare challenge this heavy, frustrating burden? It takes work, but I’m here to help. For every person who comes into my shop, telling me how “nothing looks good on me,” I feel a challenge. As much as I love slinky dresses, cut on the bias, my under-five-feet body cannot handle how a dress that is meant to gently caress the waist falls exactly over my round belly. Darn! And if I fixate on wanting that to work, or being angry that I didn’t get the body I wanted, I’m not going to contentedly live with the body I got. Learning that has helped me work with you, as my customer, in the same way. And if I can help you change your internal attitude about your body, even just a little, I’d be quite pleased. Not exactly a game-changer – but a shift to a kinder place.
